The one I didn't really want to write...

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I've been trying to "get the word out" about my little blog.


In and of itself, getting the word out isn't a problem...

but my heart sure was.

At first I said to myself, "this is a wonderful way to share what God is teaching me"...

and it is.

But somehow it became an obsession desire to see if I'd gotten new followers or comments...

And then, somewhere along the way, I forgot my purpose...

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God has given me a gift to write, and I always intended to write everything for his glory...but I fell short.

As I spent some time in quiet reflection and prayer, I felt convicted and I felt the Holy Spirit saying...

"This attitude isn't right."

...and I realized, this "slip" back into Martha-ness (post here), the nagging feeling that something wasn't right...

It was all related. It's all because I lost my purpose...

You see, it's not really about me.

I knew that, but I lost sight of that truth. This blog and everything else in my life is for God's glory...except when my ego gets in the way...

I've confessed and asked for forgiveness. And that "not right feeling..."

It's gone.

His mercies are new every morning. I'm so thankful for that truth...even when it means I have to swallow my pride. 

Just a little while...

It's early as I write this. The house is quiet and my steaming mug of tea is next to the keyboard as I type. I am thankful for this stillness because it encourages me to be still and listen for my Father's voice.

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In this quiet moment, it is easy to be a "Mary" (see my post here).

Nothing is blocking out His voice, clamoring for my attention, and I feel renewed and refreshed from the time I spent in His presence.

There is no fear when I am with Him. I lay all my concerns at His feet, confident that He knows best.

I see so clearly when I am with my Savior. It is well with my soul in this moment.

As I start my day, I know my little talk with Jesus will sustain me.

Just a wanna-be...

I'm a Mary wanna-be...

I'm really a Martha at heart. Short-sighted, obsessive, focused on all the wrong things...

My Heavenly Father tried to woo me away from the laundry today while it was quiet. He wanted me to spend time with Him. I hate doing laundry! It should have been a no-brainer. But, alas, I promised to "do it later when-all-the-laundry-was-neatly-folded-and-put-away"...

Fail. I never got back to Him.

He put some friends on my heart as I checked email...I prayed, but not with my whole attention. My mind was making a list of poetry terms...

Fail.

As I sat in the quiet of the schoolroom, my thoughts spiraled around and through the events of the day... I had (several times) heard my Savior calling me, and had pushed Him aside.

Epic Fail.

Humbled, I turned to the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10: 38 - 42. (You can read it here.) The text could have read, "But Kristi was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made..."

Jesus was right there, he wanted my attention today...but I allowed my focus to shift to the "preparations" instead of my Savior.

So, right now, I'm just a Mary wanna-be.

But I'm trying. I will get better. There are no other priorities above my relationship with Jesus. I just have to live that way...every moment...even when there's laundry to be folded.

The next time He calls me away, I hope to lay everything aside and be in His presence.

Maybe sometime soon I'll be able to say...

"Kristi has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her."

What are you doing to banish your Martha nature?


Linking up here:

and here:

First things first...

We're in a kind of "Holiday Limbo" around here...

The Christmas lights are on the bushes and trees and also neatly line our roof. They look so beautiful twinkling in the darkness.

But, I also have pumpkins on the front porch. They are still beautiful in their oranges, greens and yellows and they remind me that the time of Thanksgiving is not yet over...

Had it not been for the 60+ degree weather around here last weekend, we would never have had our Christmas lights up so early. My husband wisely decided to take advantage of the warmth to hang the Christmas lights with our neighbor and his son. (I guess he didn't enjoy hanging Christmas lights in the freezing cold last year...)

It almost feels like we're trying to celebrate two holidays at once. But maybe that's ok.

You see, I want my children to approach the Christmas season with Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving for a God who loved us enough to send His Son, Jesus, to be Emmanuel, God with us. Without that amazing gift, there would be nothing to celebrate at Christmas.

Thanksgiving for a home, plenty of food, family and friends, and the other innumerable blessings we enjoy because there are so many who are without those things.

I saw a full-page ad in the Sunday Paper from an insurance company that said simply:

"Celebrate Thanksgetting" 

To counteract this, and other negative messages, I think I'm going to keep the pumpkins up for a little while longer...

...just so we don't forget to give thanks first.

A tradition is born...

We've started a new family tradition! 


I love it because it doesn't require any $$...

just time and creativity!!

A few weeks ago at bedtime on a Sunday evening, Little Man said, "You know what today was?" We all made guesses of obscure holidays and anniversaries. He said, 

"No, It was SUNDAY FUNDAY!"

He was right.

We spent the morning at church, ate leftovers for lunch, and then played football while little one napped. For dinner, I had pulled out all the stops with homemade stuffing, baked turkey, and my kids' favorite green beans. It was like Thanksgiving a few weeks early. Then we read some pre-Thanksgiving stories while curled up on the couch. As the kids brushed their teeth, my hubby and I talked a bit about our day together and then headed up to put the kids to bed without realizing we had done anything super special.

Then, out of the blue, Little Man reminded us that a new tradition was born. Sunday Funday...A new tradition that involved lots of laughter, silliness and time together. And while I had made a special dinner, it wasn't about the food. 

That's how it is sometimes with traditions. They are born out of the ordinary, the humble and are exalted to the status of tradition only by their repetition. 

We have tried very hard to create some of our family traditions (and sometimes have even gone to great expense), but Sunday Funday is my favorite. 

It's a quiet little oasis of family togetherness before a new week begins. A reminder that laughter and love are the glue that holds our family together.

I think it's a keeper.

What traditions are you creating with your family?

Linking up here...

and here...

Thankful...a little list...

Grace from my Heavenly Father...

My amazing husband (He really does put up with a lot!)...

My beautiful kids...

My family far and near...

My mother-in-law and father-in-law...

My sister-in-law, brother-in-law, and my sweet nieces...

Friends who are more like family (except without all the drama)...

Warm jammies...

Church...

Hot coffee...

Our fireplace...

Left over turkey and all the trimmings...

The sound of my kids laughing...

Little man's freckled nose...

Little ones baby soft cheeks...

Precious girl's graceful dancing...

Looong showers...

Candlelight...

Putting the kids to bed...

Homeschooling...

Comfortable pauses in conversation...

Mom's night...

Music that soothes my soul...

What are you most thankful for?

Linking up here...

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Little foxes...

Sometimes you just have to be deliberate about things.

I'd love to be spontaneous, exciting and free, but we have three kids...and we homeschool...so I have about an hour a day to be spontaneous...and that is too small of a window of opportunity.

My husband and I have started waking up early - before the kids.

And I'm hopeful that sometime soon it will become a time to talk, connect and pray together before we start our days.

Right now, getting up early means hitting the snooze button and then standing in the shower for an almost obscene amount of time to "wake up."

But we will adjust (won't we?). 

I'm dreaming of conversations over steaming mugs of coffee and a chance to pray our day through together. I don't know about you, but something amazing always happens when my husband prays for me. Some days, the sweet echo of his prayer is like a life raft for me.

We are also scheduling dates...or at least trying to. We are both weary of months that fly by without an opportunity to make our marriage better. So we're being deliberate.

Once a month is our goal. A time to reconnect and realize that we are more than just "mom" and "dad" that we are lovers and friends.

I don't want to look at my husband when little one is finally ready to leave the nest and say

"Who are you?"

In Song of Solomon 2:15 God issues a warning that is relevant to all married couples...with kids and without. (You can read it here.)

"Catch the foxes for us, the little foxes that spoil the vineyards, for our vineyards are in blossom."

In our relationship, we've found that our "little fox" is the disconnect that comes from not spending time together. 

We want our marriage to be a beautiful vineyard, so we're going to work together to rid our relationship of its "little foxes." 

What is your "little fox"?

Sent with a prayer...

We had the awesome privilege of sending 2 Operation Christmas Child boxes back to church on Sunday. 


As we packed the boxes with the various items we purchased, the kids wondered who would get our boxes. 


We tried to guess which country they would go to, and what the child would like best when they opened the gifts. We prayed over the boxes when we were finished - praying that these far-away kids would come to know God through the simple gifts of soap, shirts, socks and other essentials. 


All three of my kids even made cards to put in the boxes and then were concerned because they were written in English. Little man said, "What if they can't read it? Should we write them in a different language?" My hubby and I assured them that they would be able to understand what was in the cards. 


My precious girl said "Love is like that. You can just see it."


I think she's right.






If you want more information about Operation Christmas Child you can link here.

and your heart will follow...

I posted last week about the "everyday feeling" that I was having...(You can read it here.) I'll have to admit that I had a case of the galloping grumpies that day. (Ok, and the next one a little bit too...)

I wish I could say that I immediately recognized the problem and snapped out of it...

I didn't.

But I did decide to start giving thanks in the midst of my every day tasks.

At first, it was a bit contrived - it felt, stiff, unnatural - like a new pair of shoes...

Thank you, God for these sticky fingerprints on the table...*sigh*

Thank you, God for this dirty laundry...*frown*

But I was determined to beat the grumpies and I persevered....

While cleaning up legos for the millionth time, I could say

"thank you, God for my little man's boundless creativity...and a special friend to share it with..."

While stepping over my precious girl's hardshoes (for Irish Dance) I said

"thank you, God for her talent, grace and beauty...thank you for the friends that share her passion..."

While bringing another drink to little one (who really should have been asleep) I said

"thank you, God that seeing me makes her feel safe."

You know what? All of those were sincere.
No exaggerated sighs.
No eye-rolling.
Even a few wistful smiles as I realized that this stage of my life won't last forever, and I had better enjoy it now, or regret it later.

I'm glad I pushed through. It was amazing to watch God recognize my feeble efforts at being thankful. It was also amazing to see how quickly my heart followed. Soon it wasn't just a mind-exercise, it was honest-to-goodness thanksgiving and praise.

I wish I could tell you that thanksgiving immediately springs to my lips - but at least I'm thinking about it. And that is a start.

Wishing you lots of true thanksgiving this week!

Sharing our gifts...

Tonight our homeschool co-op had its Parent's Night to celebrate the end of the first semester. Anxious parents watched the presentations as shining little faces shared what they had learned. Little one got to sing a song with her preschool class. Little man got to do an amazing skit on how Pluto isn't a planet anymore, and my Precious Girl got to do a presentation for her Chemistry class on the element, Boron. This is one proud mama tonight!

Each time we gather for our co-op on Friday mornings, I am blown away by the amazing women and children that God has gathered. These wonderful, Godly women constantly encourage me in my homeschooling journey and in my walk with Jesus. They lovingly teach my children in their areas of expertise. They share their talents freely and the conversations in the "mom's room" never fail to satisfy.

Our co-op is an example of the beauty that comes when like-minded women gather together and share their gifts.

I'm blessed to be a part of it.

A quiet start...

It's quiet here.
Too quiet.

The oldest 2 are still sleeping, and little one is looking at a book here beside me. It's so quiet that I can hear the coffeepot clicking, and the noise of my typing seems loud.

This quiet is a gift. 

God knows that sometimes I feel like the Grinch ("all the noise, noise, noise...") and my soul needs these quiet times to restore my sanity.

I could pray without losing my focus. 

I read my devotion without interruption.

But now that my coffee is growing cold in the mug and my Bible is closed, the quiet no longer feels "right."

Now that I've had some quiet time, I'm very thankful to hear my son yawning and stretching in his room. He'll be downstairs in a moment. I'm thankful to hear the quiet steps of my lovely daughter on the stairs. She smiles as she says "Good morning, Mom."  I'm thankful that little one crawled up in my lap and said "hold you me mommy?"

The quiet was really special, God. But now I'm ready to start my day.

How do you like to start your day?

Following where He leads...

I can't see into the future. 

I know that comes as no big surprise, but that fact really drives me crazy sometimes. I hear God's voice so clearly, telling me to step out in faith; and I want to, I really do...

...but there is no roadmap...
...no clear next step...

In her book, Jesus Calling, Sarah Young describes this beautifully...

"As you look again at the path ahead, you notice that a peaceful fog has settled over it, obscuring your view." (pg. 335)

My view of the future is obscured, not by clouds and darkness, but by a peaceful, protective fog placed there by my Heavenly Father.  You see, He doesn't want me to see what is ahead this time; He knows all too well that I'll worry and fret over details that He already has in control. So he has lovingly asked me to take a leap of faith, to trust Him with the details that I can't make sense of (even though I have tried). He's asking me to fix my gaze on HIM...not the path.

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I'll admit, as soon as I get distracted from God, the little details seem looming and anxious thoughts creep in. But He lovingly redirects my gaze and asks me to put one foot in front of the other and follow Him.

I may not know where I'm going, but I know that the One who is leading me is infinitely faithful and loving. I'll follow where He leads me...one step of faith at a time.

Where is God leading you?

Going through the motions...

Lately everything has felt oh-so-everyday...

Do you know that feeling?

Cook breakfast...
clean up breakfast...
do school...
fix a snack...
plan next day's school...
do laundry...
cook lunch...
clean up lunch...
do laundry...
fix a snack...
do devotions (if I'm lucky)...
do laundry...
sweep the floors...

and so on, and so on...

with no. 

end. 

in. 

sight.

(insert large sigh here)

So why is it that some days I can BE the Proverbs 31 woman and do everything with a song in my heart and a smile on my face and my children will call me...

blessed...

and then other days my children will call me...

grouchy...

Sometimes, I forget that the every-day-ness of my life doesn't negate its importance. 

The Holy Spirit is right there with me as I'm sorting socks, and maybe it should be an opportunity to pray (as opposed to complain). Or, even better, perhaps I could thank God that we had enough food to eat as I'm rinsing the plates. 

Motherhood isn't always glamorous, but it is oh-so-important. I'm changing the world, right from my home. I'm on the path that God wants me on - even if it is sometimes covered with laundry.

Linking up to...

A beautiful moment...

I had to fight back tears during our Bible time this morning...

It was one of those moments where you could see God's word flowing into little hearts as they "got it."

And I got to be there to share in it!

We read the story in Joshua 10: 1 - 15 about the day God made the sun stand still. (You can read it here.) My kids were fascinated by the story.

wondering how scientists would try to explain it away...

wondering why God asks for our cooperation in his plans 

when he could just do it himself...

wondering why our bad choices don't mess up God's plans... 

Big thoughts. Big questions.

I felt the presence of our Big God this morning in our little schoolroom as we learned more about him.

It was beautiful to look at the 3 little faces gathered around me as they prayed and thanked God for his word and for his plans for our lives.

Today is one that I will treasure in my heart, because today I watched my kids draw closer to their Heavenly Father.