Thursday, May 27, 2010

Sweeter than honey...

"You're an awesome wife."
That's what Brian said as he left for work this morning. I can't stop smiling. Someone thinks I'm awesome...it's a pretty good feeling.

It is way too easy in the rush of life to criticize or just be "functional" in our speech. But it really does take some effort to compliment and encourage someone. I often think encouraging things about others and as they come to mind I thank God for that particular person, but my follow up for actually sharing those encouraging words needs some work. I've really been trying to do better with that because, as I experienced again this morning, sweet words really do make you feel special. Through Brian's words I could feel God smiling on me. For the price of our effort, we too, can make the difference in someone's day by encouraging and complimenting.

Proverbs 16:24 says:
"Pleasant words are a honeycomb,
       sweet to the soul and healing to the bones."

Who needs to hear our encouragement this morning? I will ask God, and follow up on what He shares with me!

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

A delightful wife...?

I love to entertain. There is nothing I enjoy more than preparing to have guests in our home. I delight in the preparation and all the "little touches" that go into making people feel welcome. After a weekend of entertaining guests and being a hostess, it was kind of nice to go back to regular life yesterday.

This morning, the Lord drew my attention to this verse...
May your fountain be blessed,
       and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth.  Proverbs 5:18
I started to reflect on that verse and what it meant for me. What does it mean to rejoice? Do I give my husband something to rejoice in? When we have guests, I spend the whole day making preparations, but do I routinely do the same thing for my own dear husband? Do I make it easy for him to rejoice or delight in coming home to me?

Sadly, this is what my husband walked into yesterday at 5:15...I had on my painting clothes, paint in my hair, no supper started (or even thought about), and smoke was coming out of my ears as I had just sent the little darlings to their respective rooms for a time out. Now, that was a scene for him to rejoice in! I realize that more often than not, I give my husband very little to delight in when he comes home for the day. I want him to look forward to coming home as much as I do. I want to be a wife to rejoice in! I want my home to be a place of rest and peace, for my family as much as my guests. It really won't be that hard, just a bit more pre-planning and involving the children in getting ready for daddy. I want to show my husband that I look forward to his arrival at the end of his work day. He is the head of the house and my enthusiasm and energy shouldn't just be reserved for our guests!

Monday, May 24, 2010

Caution or Fear?

There have been several child abduction attempts frighteningly close to our home. The bold, in-broad-daylight-in-front-of-others kind that make you feel sick. I have really been battling with fear because of that. I want to protect my children from a person whose only intent is to harm - my mind can't even go there. But I don't want to cause my precious children to live in fear. I want to go on with my life, but I don't want to take any unnecessary risks either. So where do I draw the line between caution and fear?

As my husband prayed over me last night, I decided to really look in the Bible for the answer. God is pretty clear on this subject of fear. I was surprised how many times I came across "fear not" just in the book of Genesis alone. God doesn't tell us that He'd rather we weren't afraid. He says, "Fear not, I am your shield" (Gen. 15:1), "Fear not, for I have heard" (Gen. 21:17), "Fear not, for I am with you and will bless you" (Gen. 26: 24). One of the sweetest verses on this topic comes in the book of Isaiah (God keeps drawing me back to this book lately).

fear not, for I am with you;
   be not dismayed, for I am your God;
I will strengthen you, I will help you,
   I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10
God's perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18). He has promised that He will be with me and uphold me. The key, for me, seems to be to spend time with Him and let His love and reassurance flow into my life so that the fear retreats. I must admit that it is still in the background, and probably will be until this person is caught, but it is an issue that I am actively dealing with. God can't reassure me if I don't spend time with Him. God can't uphold me if I'm trying to do everything in my own strength. I'm trying to rest in Him and to fight this battle on my knees. God certainly wants me to pray protection over my home and my community because He can be everywhere at once and I can't. I will go on with my life (hopefully less fearfully) but we will be a bit more cautious of our surroundings. So where is the line? I'm still not sure. I do know, however,  that God will fill me with the wisdom and strength to overcome my fears if I'm willing to cling to Him.

Friday, May 21, 2010

A Sanballat Moment...

Sometimes you just know you're doing the right thing because of the attacks that come your way. Does this happen to you too? You step out to do what you know you should and the attacks start...It seems to happen to me frequently - the more I know I am walking in what God wants me to do, the more I am plagued by "naysayers" and doubt. I have learned, however, not to listen to those who tell me I'm crazy (otherwise I'd have never started homeschooling). I look at it almost like a backhanded confirmation. This morning, the Lord drew my attention to the story of Nehemiah. He was called to finish building the wall around Jerusalem. This was no small undertaking and almost as soon as Nehemiah started, Sanballat and Tobiah and their cronies gathered around to jeer and taunt and criticize.
Now when Sanballat heard that we were building the wall, he was angry and greatly enraged, and he jeered at the Jews. 2And he said in the presence of his brothers and of the army of Samaria, "What are these feeble Jews doing? Will they restore it for themselves? Will they sacrifice? Will they finish up in a day? Will they revive the stones out of the heaps of rubbish, and burned ones at that?" 3Tobiah the Ammonite was beside him, and he said, "Yes, what they are building—if a fox goes up on it he will break down their stone wall!" (Nehemiah 4: 1 - 3 ESV)
This passage can teach us about our critics. First, critics seldom act on their own. There is safety in numbers. You certainly don't want to be the only critic in the crowd of onlookers! Second, they didn't come against Nehemiah until he began to build. Action brings about the opposition. "Knowing" what you should do isn't enough. And this passage is telling in another way, Sanballat was angry and that caused him to come against the Jews - He knew that they were doing the Lord's will and just wanted it stopped. Satan isn't interested in messing with us until we are fully committed to doing God's will. If we're just coasting, there won't be any opposition. Lukewarm and safe isn't going to draw any fire from the enemy.

What was Nehemiah's response? Did he cower with fear, run for cover, say "you're right, this is as crazy idea. Thanks for the warning." No. He prayed. And after he prayed, he got right back to the building. Verse 6 is my favorite.
 6So we built the wall. And all the wall was joined together to half its height, for the people had a mind to work. (Nehemiah 4: 6 emphasis mine)
 What an awesome response! "So we built the wall!" If you are feeling a bit under fire lately, perhaps it's because you are exactly where you're supposed to be. Confer with the Lord. He'll let you know your next steps. Then allow the Master Builder and Architect of your life direct you. The critics will always be there. Fine tune your hearing to the Lord's voice.
The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing. (Zephaniah 3:17 ESV)
I'd rather hear Jesus singing than my critics any day!!

Thursday, May 20, 2010

A love letter from my Father...

Since I've been reading through the Bible this year, my intention has been to read it from cover to cover in 365 days. That is the "goal." I've read the Bible, every verse, every chapter, but never straight through cover to cover.  (If you haven't ever done this, I'd encourage you to do it! It's never too late to start. You can even find on-line reading schedules to suit your personal needs.)

My time with the Lord is my favorite part of the day. This is especially true when I do my reading before I do anything else. I can't wait to see what He wants to tell me through His word. Verses that I have read time after time seem new and fresh. I see new applications in my life. I'm hearing from God in a way I've experienced only sporadically before this adventure in reading. This is exciting stuff!! I am blessed every day to see Hebrews 4:12 in action. "For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart."

This morning I was reading Psalm 139 (always one of my favorites) and I felt drawn to verse 16. I am especially fond of how it is stated in The Message.

You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit,
      how I was sculpted from nothing into something.
   Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth;
      all the stages of my life were spread out before you,
   The days of my life all prepared
      before I'd even lived one day. (The Message)

Our tomorrows are already laid out and perfectly designed by One who loves us more than we can imagine -  the troubling times laid out just as lovingly as the joyful times. I take great comfort today in knowing I really don't have to worry about tomorrow because the One who designed me has created good things for me to do.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

In defense of fatherhood...

On Saturday I watched a father out playing with his kids with complete abandon and joy. The sight brought tears to my eyes. A sight that should be so normal, so everyday, has become rare. Where have all the fathers gone? I've been dismayed at my son's tee ball practices that my husband and my father have been the few males present (other than the coach). My own father, Kevin's grandpa, drives 1/2 hour from Ephrata every Saturday morning to be there to help coach because no other fathers were there and/or willing that first practice. What is going on with our society when even tee ball is showing signs of absentee fathers? I understand that some must work, and some are single moms but those are probably the exceptions. So where are the daddys?

This is another issue that has driven me to my knees lately. God has really laid it upon my heart to pray for fathers. As I watched a video at church about dads who are at Angola prison I was moved to tears. These men, whose lives were changed by Christ, were given an opportunity to break the generational bondage with their own children.  I realize just how blessed I am that my own dad was so involved in my growing up years. That fact alone may have kept me from getting in more trouble than I know! I also realize how blessed my own children are to have a wonderful, loving, involved daddy in their lives. So why are so few blessed as I have been?

I'm not a TV fan...at all. It's used in emergency situations only in our house (like when I'm too sick to move) or for a rare TV show that we all decide to watch. But what I've noticed as I've watched lately is, men are portrayed as complete morons on television shows. Mothers are the all-knowing goddesses of the home while the men are bungling, yet lovable, comedic relief. That is completely backwards and wrong! Where are the good role models for fathers in society at large? Are there any? Little boys like my son certainly can't even look to "sports heroes" any more. So it is, perhaps, no wonder that the fathers have left the sports practices as well. If no one tells men in our society about the Ultimate Father, nothing will ever change.

My heart breaks for the fathers out there that feel worthless and disrespected by their wives. My heart goes out to those that may want to try but never had fatherhood modeled for them. I know it breaks my Heavenly Father's heart to see so many men hurting and lost. I can't help but think of Malachi 4:6 "He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse."

Perhaps it can start with us as wives and mothers to model Godly womanhood in our homes: to respect our husbands with what we say and what we do.  To pray for them and with them. To show our sons a more excellent way...I want my son to grow up knowing who he is in Christ. I thank God that he has so many good role models at Church, and most importantly, one in his own home. Thank you, Brian for being a Godly father to our son, and a loving coach to those dear little ones on your team.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

To Do List, Interrupted...

Yesterday there was a flurry of activity around our house. My son dubbed me the "cleaning tornado" and I have an organized closet and peaceful master bedroom to show for it. This morning I was in the midst of making a to-do list for the next several days with all the big projects to accomplish when God interrupted my list at about number 23...

Check your email.
Ok, God. Should I try and tackle Kevin's closet or the basement bookshelf first??
Email...

When I looked, I realized how insignificant my projects truly were. A dear friend of mine is in the ICU with preeclampsia complications following the birth of her precious and long-awaited little girl. Another dear friend's precious grandmother has taken a turn for the worse. I'm sure they aren't the only ones hurting or sick today and I was moved to tears with thankfulness that God drew my attention to what really matters.

My revised list looks something like this...
1. Wait on the Lord
2. Pray
3. Repeat

I thank God that he never forgets his hurting, broken people. I thank God for his faithfulness. I thank God for the opportunity to pray. I thank God for an interrupted to-do list.

Monday, May 17, 2010

The Gift of Monday...

It's always hard to say goodbye to my husband as he heads out the door to work on a Monday. I love the time we spend together as a family on the weekends. This particular morning it was harder than usual because we had such an awesome conversation and time of prayer last night. Even though he'll be home at lunch, I still miss him and find myself counting down until he comes home.

We heard an awesome message at church yesterday about being soft and moldable in our walk with Christ. We talked a lot about that message which led to other really good conversations. Don't you just love when the message you hear on Sunday spurs you to action?!

That is the gift of Monday. Yesterday, our spiritual tanks were refilled with corporate worship and prayer - which is a very powerful thing - today, it is my challenge to now "walk out" what I heard yesterday. To work those wise words into my life and to make changes. The gift of Monday is a new beginning, a new opportunity to share Jesus with all those we come in contact with today. I'm excited to see what God is going to do this week.

Monday is a day full of opportunity and promise for the week ahead. How we start today can impact our entire week. May we all start well today!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Lessons learned...

Today is our last official day of school. Whew! This has been a difficult year, a growing year. There were days when I wasn't sure we could do it, but we did by God's matchless grace. We all made it through and we even managed to learn some really cool things. As I've been reflecting over this past year at the "Slattery Academy" I have been blessed to see how much we've all grown.

I've learned that I can't let myself run empty spiritually or I will have nothing to give to anyone. If my children weren't with me 24/7/365, I may never have learned that. My time with Jesus every morning is precious. Because it is usually not quiet here, I've had to learn to quiet my heart and meditate on God's word with a toddler wiggling on my lap. When I get out my Bible, Jordyn often says "Jesus, Bible." I hope this becomes ingrained in her memory so that she won't struggle with prioritizing time for Jesus as I did. I don't want her to be 35 before she realizes that time with Jesus is the most important thing. I can go without breakfast, but not without my time with the Lord. One morning, when I was particularly grouchy, Erin said, "Mommy did you get to do your devotions yet?" I hadn't. I was humbled that the difference was so striking.

We learned perseverance and focus. There were days when the toddler tornado was so distracting and "busy" that we could barely concentrate. If she could dump it out, rip it up, climb it...you get the picture. We pushed through, we adapted and we learned a wonderful lesson. We learned that concentrating is a skill. I'm proud to say that my kids can take a math test without silence. I think the real world implications for this will help them go far.

We learned to put others first. There was only one mommy and three people who needed her. We learned to say, "that's ok. I'll wait" or even, "I'll try it myself." We experienced the joy of doing a task we didn't think we could. We learned that there is no greater joy than serving others. We learned that many hands make light work. Folding laundry, dusting, washing dishes, etc. takes no time at all when we all pitch in. We learned to finish well. It was hard to do school work when the sunshine was beckoning. Sometimes we gave in and just enjoyed the gift, and sometimes we learned how much sweeter the sunshine feels after the work is done.

Perhaps most importantly, we learned how much we love being together. We learned that home is the best place in the whole world and that there was no place we'd rather be (except maybe at co op). Where ever the journey takes us, I know we are stronger together. Praise God for His faithfulness!

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

Who's carrying the torch??

I just love when I read scripture and God reveals something really cool! I love that by God's grace I have a new hunger for His word and I really look forward to my morning time with Him. I am also thankful that nothing quite feels right on the days when I neglect to spend time with Him. He is so faithful when we seek Him!

I am learning a bit more each day what it means to "lean not on your own understanding." Sometimes when I read a difficult passage of scripture, I immediately go to the notes at the bottom of the page to help me understand, or I ask my husband, or I run to the computer and look up the passage in several different versions. There's probably nothing wrong with doing that, but this morning God gently whispered to my heart - could I explain it to you now? Yikes! My chin just about hit the table! Why was I looking everywhere for the answers when the Author was waiting for me to talk to Him? He led me to this passage in Isaiah 50: 10, 11.

10 Who among you fears the LORD
       and obeys the word of his servant?
       Let him who walks in the dark,
       who has no light,
       trust in the name of the LORD
       and rely on his God.
 11 But now, all you who light fires
       and provide yourselves with flaming torches,
       go, walk in the light of your fires
       and of the torches you have set ablaze.
       This is what you shall receive from my hand:
       You will lie down in torment.

I was walking in the light of my own torch...again. I was so impatient for an answer that I almost missed an opportunity to meet with God this morning. How much torment do I subject myself to by trying to walk along with my own flashlight instead of relying on God for light and direction? As I go through this life, my dim little light isn't going to be sufficient. I'd rather walk in the dark and let God show me the way. I don't know about you, but I'd rather know that the Creator of the Universe is carrying my torch. I think I'll put my torch away now and wait.

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Lessons from a bird...

I am so thankful that our God is a lover of beauty. Can you imagine a world devoid of color, of flowers and trees? I'm thankful that he created us with eyes to see, ears to hear, and minds to comprehend our surroundings. I'm struck by the beauty of the world He created every time I look out our window. I enjoy watching the flowers poke up through the mulch, grow taller and bloom with vibrant colors. I am especially fond of watching the birds that have decided to make our home, theirs.

The birds seem to love our house. I wake up to a virtual symphony every morning. They hang on our window screens, sit on our rain spouts and sing their little hearts out. One bird family has a nest behind a shutter, another has just built a nest in my hanging basket. My husband accidentally found this particular nest. He took the flowers down to water, and those persistent little birds (who had been trying to build over our front door) had settled in among the flowers and laid three tiny, speckled eggs. He called us all to come and see. They were so beautiful and small, so fragile and unprotected there. He gently put the basket back on its hook under the watchful eyes of the mother and father bird. The kids and I find ourselves going to the dining room window to peek out and see the mother bird sitting on her eggs. She sits there so quiet and still, all of her energy focused on protecting those tiny eggs.

As a mother myself, I feel I understand her as she sits quietly among the flowers, protecting her little ones. Her instinct is to protect and nurture, to feed, to train and eventually release her little ones into the care of the One who made them. She's really not so different than me. I too have the privilege of protecting, nurturing, training and eventually (not too soon, please!) releasing my children to try out their own wings. Even on those difficult days of mothering, I need to remind myself how quickly the time passes, how little time they really spend in our "nest." As I enter each new phase of mothering, may I wait with quiet expectation safely under the wing of my Heavenly Father.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Out with the old...

It seems fitting that as I finish up our school year this week, we are also preparing for our neighborhood yard sale. I've never done a yard sale, I've always just given stuff away, but this year I decided to give it a try. Not being a fan of holding onto things we no longer use, this whole process has been kind of freeing! I've gone through boxes still taped closed from our move almost seven months ago and realized that we can live without that extra "stuff." It was enjoyable to make piles of things we want to sell, things to throw away, and things to donate to charity. Our basement is now a mess of piles, but the overall clutter has diminished a bit.

I was doing really well until it came time to go through the baby stuff. It was so easy to toss away old pots and pans and toys, but to put aside tiny socks and onesies...I wasn't prepared for the crush of emotions as I realized that we really didn't need to hold on to those things anymore. I was a bit sad, but I was ok until I came upon a tiny pair of shoes...My little one's Robeez, sage green with pink and brown dots on the top...a perfect fit for her tiny toes as she mastered walking. I was undone. I sobbed as I cradled those shoes and remembered. In a way I can't quite comprehend, I needed to keep those little shoes. Maybe it's because it represented such a milestone as - she who we weren't sure would live - mastered walking. Maybe it's because those shoes are a reminder of God's faithfulness in my little one's life. I'm not sure why, but those shoes are now safely tucked away in my drawer along with other precious mementos of my children. Looking at the collection as an outsider, it would seem random, but I can recall just why I kept each of those little reminders.

Motherhood is a process of letting go, of allowing our children to grow in the training and admonition of the Lord. Sometimes that means watching from the sidelines and cheering on the victories or softening the blow of a defeat, and sometimes it is a simple act of remembering where we've been and how far we have yet to go.

I think, in a way, by letting go of some of the unnecessary things in my house, I've freed up space in my life for something new. God was tugging at my soul and reminding me that if I hold on too tightly to things of the past, I won't be able to walk into the beautiful plan He has for my life. I tucked those little shoes away for now. They are there when I want to remember, but, for today, I choose to look forward to the future with joyful expectation of what God will do.

Wednesday, May 05, 2010

Preparations...

I have been working like crazy preparing for upcoming events. Several birthday parties to buy presents for, thank you cards for a recent party, Mother's Day cards, party invitations for my son, planning curriculum for next year, sorting stuff for our neighborhood yard sale, plus all of my normal tasks... Busy, busy, busy. Sadly, my to-do list is still very long. I feel like I've made very little progress for all of the energy I've expended.

What struck me most today is how little I've included God in all my preparations. I've been working on next year's studies for my 2 oldest, but have I been praying for wisdom as I chose curriculum? No. I've finished preparing our homeschool portfolio for evaluation tomorrow, and I don't think I took a moment to thank God for mercifully guiding us through another year of homeschooling. It's almost as if I've left God on the fringes of my activities this week. It's so easy to trust him for the big stuff in life...but I really struggle with involving Him in the little things.

I want a relationship with my Father where I can rest assured that He is in control of everything in my life, the big and the small. All I have to do is let it go...

Tomorrow is the National Day of Prayer. For me, it will be a time of "hanging out" with my Heavenly Father. I want to be sure He has first place in my life. Tomorrow, I want to rejoice in being the daughter of the King, to stop all the preparations and just be in His presence.

Tuesday, May 04, 2010

Dry spaghetti...

I was blissfully enjoying my morning shower when my son calmly walked into the bathroom...
K - "Hi, Mommy. How are you doing?"
Mommy - "I'm fine son, what is it that you need? I am taking a shower."
K - "Oh, yeah. Ummmm...I think the toaster is on fire."
Mommy - "WHAT????!!!!!"
K - "Maybe the toast is on fire or something."
I had just put the shampoo in my hair when he made this revelation. I grabbed my towel and robe and ran downstairs to find that the toaster was filled with what looked like charcoal. There was no fire, praise God, but it had tripped the reset button on the outlet.

Did you ever know (and I mean really KNOW) that God is trying to teach you something? For the past several days nothing has gone according to plan. The kids have been fighting like crazy, I am frazzled and tired and just about at the end of my rope. Unfortunately it took all of the above for me to consult God about what he may be trying to work on in my life. Lord, what are you trying to tell me? What needs to change? Please help me to know! I calmed my mind and heart when I got back into the shower (it's really the only place I can think) and God said,

"Bend or break?" 

What? Bend or break...?

When I reflected over the events of the past few days I realized what that means. You see, I tend to be very "first born" in my need for things to go according to plan (i.e. Just do it my way and everything will be fine). I realized that I am, once again, getting way too caught up in the little details and am missing the big picture.

God is gently trying to teach me flexibility. My dear friend (who is a treasure trove of object lessons) once illustrated this with a piece of dry spaghetti and a piece of cooked spaghetti. I am "dry spaghetti" right now. Things aren't working out and I am snapping all over the place. I need to be flexible, teachable so I don't get so stressed out. The cool thing about cooked spaghetti? You can bend and mold it into just about any shape you want. That's what God wants for me. He wants me to stay flexible...even when the toaster is on fire.

Hoping you all have a "cooked spaghetti" day!

Monday, May 03, 2010

Rewind...

They were fighting already. It didn't matter that the children had only been awake for half an hour. There was yelling and stomping of feet and crying and lots of "righteous indignation." Why is it that the moment I try and take a shower (or make a phone call) the children start to argue and fuss at each other? I could blame it on the rainy, dreary weather, but I won't. We all know better than that.

I warned from the top of the stairs..."I am a mommy, not a referee! Please try and work it out!"...and then I waited, counted to 100 or so and began to feel more calm when I heard the slap. Someone hit someone else and that was IT!

I ran downstairs to see what had happened and to try and sort out the ensuing chaos. Everyone was crying, everyone was angry, everyone was talking at once, and no one was listening to me. "THAT'S IT! GO BACK UP TO YOUR ROOMS AND START OVER!" Silence. That declaration was met with three blank stares. I lowered the tone of my voice and declared that we were rewinding today. We were going to go back upstairs and start our day over, this time the right way. We prayed and you could feel the tension dissipate. My two oldest decided that the only appropriate way to rewind the day was to walk backwards through the house and up the stairs. The little one and I joined in and we all started to laugh. We crawled back in our beds and "woke up" again - this time being exceedingly polite. "Good morning little cherubs. How are you all feeling on this beautiful Spring morning?" (more giggling). "Good morning, dear mother. Might I pour you some coffee." What could have been a disastrous start to our day was turned around by prayer, a little laughter and some forgiveness.

I thank God that He graciously allows us to "press the rewind button" in our walk with Him. We don't have to continue in our wrong thinking or our grouchiness (even if it is raining). All we have to do is confess where we went wrong and He will help us make things right.

Sunday, May 02, 2010

Having it all together...

I'm not perfect.

There, I said it.

Are you shocked? I don't think a single one of you fell out of your chair (except perhaps with laughter) when you read that statement.

So why is it so important that I give the appearance of "having it all together?" Am I the only one? I doubt it, because God interrupted my shower with this blog post. Why is it that I seem to only cling to the first part of Philippians 4:13 (I can do all things) and ignore the second (through Christ who gives me strength.)? This is just another lie that I tell myself. It is really just fear of man, and therefore, sin.

Would the world really fall apart if I left the dirty dishes on the kitchen table, or left the house in my grubby, comfy clothes? I doubt it. God can't shine through me if I'm busy covering up weakness in my life. God doesn't shine through my efforts to "do it all." He shows Himself strong when I allow myself to be weak, to say without You, Jesus, I can't even draw my next breath.

I am a perfectionist, and the daughter of a perfectionist. I don't want to curse my children with this burden, too. Because that is what having it all together is: bondage. Jesus, free me from my need to cover up just how fragile I am at times. Help me to admit to myself and to You that I really can't do it all.

Blessings to you on this Lord's Day.

Followers