Sunday, May 02, 2010

Having it all together...

I'm not perfect.

There, I said it.

Are you shocked? I don't think a single one of you fell out of your chair (except perhaps with laughter) when you read that statement.

So why is it so important that I give the appearance of "having it all together?" Am I the only one? I doubt it, because God interrupted my shower with this blog post. Why is it that I seem to only cling to the first part of Philippians 4:13 (I can do all things) and ignore the second (through Christ who gives me strength.)? This is just another lie that I tell myself. It is really just fear of man, and therefore, sin.

Would the world really fall apart if I left the dirty dishes on the kitchen table, or left the house in my grubby, comfy clothes? I doubt it. God can't shine through me if I'm busy covering up weakness in my life. God doesn't shine through my efforts to "do it all." He shows Himself strong when I allow myself to be weak, to say without You, Jesus, I can't even draw my next breath.

I am a perfectionist, and the daughter of a perfectionist. I don't want to curse my children with this burden, too. Because that is what having it all together is: bondage. Jesus, free me from my need to cover up just how fragile I am at times. Help me to admit to myself and to You that I really can't do it all.

Blessings to you on this Lord's Day.

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