I've been praying for a change of heart about a situation in my life for a while. It's one of those situations that isn't going to change on its own so the only solution is to change my attitude and my approach.
I thought I was praying fervently for this change of heart, but nothing had happened. God was even uncharacteristically silent about it. I just couldn't understand what was going on.
But yesterday as my thoughts spun to this situation and how I was going to fix it all day long, I gasped in horror as I realized that God couldn't change my heart.
I hadn't really laid this problem down, expectantly waiting for his solution. I was toying with it, turning it over in my mind and my heart...desperately trying to "fix it" myself... You see, He wasn't going to fix anything in me while I was still trying to maintain control...
I'd love nothing more than to have God divinely fix everything, but I know that what I need is an attitude transplant and a change of heart.
It finally happened when I truly laid it at the cross. I confessed that I was trying too hard to fix things in my own power (and making a terrible mess of it), I thanked God that He was in control and that He would change my point of view...
And he did...
When my anxiety and hang-wringing changed to a peace and a quiet joy that could only have come from heaven, why was I surprised?
The situation remains, yet I am not worried any more. I wait in expectation that everything will be ok...someday... But until that day comes, I can say it is well with my soul.
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